Wednesday, July 08, 2009

Dear SAA7881M

Dear jerk who owns the Hilux with the above licence number:

You were almost kissing my dilapidated Kancil's left flank, leaving me less than two inches to work my way out of my parking lot with a long line of traffic waiting behind to take over my place.

I gestured the vilest curses on your car. I pray they come true by the time this is published.

Of course, you are better than your comrades behind the wheels who take up two parking lots with one car. Presumably you trust that I would never scratch your precious metallic baby, therefore you kindly allow me to occupy the adjacent space. Oh you are definitely not as repulsive as people who park in lots reserved for disable folks.

Coming to think of it, it is rather dumb of me to spend time fuming over your inconsiderateness. Why, you are actually the superior species of the society! In this dog eat dog society, you have to grab everything. If possible, don't leave behind crumbs. That's how you accumulate so much money to buy that sparkling Hilux. I will never see that kind of money until the day I die. I wasted too much time parking my Kancil properly so as not to trouble the other drivers next to me. I should just shove into the first most convenient spot to stop my car so that I dash out A.S.A.P to attend to my money-making ventures. Let the other drivers figure out how to get out of the mess I have created. They can't sue me and surely they will never shoot me, so why bother. It's more important to take care of ME first.

It is the attitude that counts. Anyone who is slacking in their " grab anything I want at all cost" mentality gets less. Therefore it is paramount to put myself ahead of other people every second of my breathing life. Life is short so I must make the fullest out of it. Anything that comes in the way must be annihilated. Let those mongrels who drive cheap cars howl about morality. They can chew roti canais while I dine on foie grais. They can call me jerk but I am a rich jerk. Heck, that is my grandfather's road which I kindly allow them to share with me. Why do you think the traffic police close not only one eye but two eyes when other would have been fined?

o __________________ o

Thanks Jerk for the inspiration...but I still curse you to grow the biggest hemorrhoids in the deepest part of your rectum accompanied by the most chronic constipation 24/7. I am learning from you. I can't stand anyone blocking ME time even 5 seconds.

Long live meism.

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